Online Dating Methods

The next time you’re cruising for cuties online, it’s likely that a few in particular will draw you in with their looks. Do yourself a favor; pay it some due diligence, and read the entire profile before emailing. No, really, read the whole thing. Cause most of the time, I’m betting dollars to doughnuts you have nothing in common.

Ah, but they like food…”I like food too!”…and they like music? “Oh my god, ME TOO!”

What I’m getting at, is the human instinct to write about oneself in the most generalized terms possible for online dating.

(cause god forbid, they alienate their potential soulmate over a secret love for the music of Wham! era George Michael). Instead of OWNING something awesomely unique like that, you get,

“I enjoy going out, and having fun, but sometimes just stay in and chill.”

Well shit, STOP THE PRESSES. That’s only 99.9% of the global population, including eskimo’s!

Compounding upon the illusion of compatibility, is the idealistic sentiments of love that go through the brain when dating online. There have been god knows how many research papers written on the subject. I’ll save you the trouble, and distill the obvious consensus: it’s not real, so don’t get caught up in the chemicals.

The online dating world is what your mind makes of it. Before you’ve met, ‘tis far better to expect very little of that mysterious stranger behind the monitor.

Once you meet, and they’re hot, you have my permission to get excited.

Until then, you’re just setting yourself up for disappointment. Sometimes it helps to just close your eyes, and try to imagine them 1/3rd uglier…would you still like them as much?